The more aware you are of your sexual limitations, the more you can build on them. The purpose of arousal control is to prevent premature ejaculation. It won’t come to you instantly; you’ll have to work at it a little.
Arousal control is supposed to relegate your body to parasympathetic function for as long as possible, in doing so, you will be unable to move towards ejaculation.
Identifying your current arousal stage is necessary if you are to learn to control yourself. To start things off, identify the elements of stage 2, and then keep yourself in it for as long as possible during sex. Once you’ve went over into stage 3, you’ll find that it’s much harder to return to a normal state. At this point you may need to cease all activities for several minutes in order to let your arousal subside.
The bottom line is, stage 2 is where you need to park yourself if you want to last for any significant length of time. What better way to become familiar with arousal control than to learn about how your body functions. Once you’re able to identify arousal levels, all you need to do is develop the restraint to control your urges. Find out exactly what causes your arousal level to climb so high and deal with it. Arousal is actually a very mentally-centric activity; keep this in mind while learning to tame your desires.
In order to remain as calm and focused as possible, you should probably practice controlling arousal levels while masturbating, at first. That’s the easiest and best way to get familiar with your body. But you can still practice during sex if you so desire.
How do you control arousal, exactly?
There is no right or wrong answer to this question; it could be different for everyone. The ball is in your court, so to speak. We’re about to explore some possibilities; of these, it will be up to you to decide how to use them effectively.
You might have heard, that it’s best to think about other things, to completely clear you mind, or to focus completely on your partner. The truth is, all of these things are fundamentally great ideas, use them in whatever combination that works best for you. The problem is that these ideas may only function as momentary solutions for you. They are mostly just aversions to sex; you need to actually change your sexual responses.
Ultimately, the choice is yours, but you should be aware of the possibilities that exist before you make up you mind. And remember, were not trying to dull sex or its pleasure, we’re trying to improve upon it. Regardless of what you decide, you must remember to keep your body in parasympathetic mode for as long as possible; this will require deep relaxation and concentration, much deeper than anything you might have previously experienced.
You can control your arousal by simply shifting your focus away from it; in this way, you can maintain control of your parasympathetic system for a longer period of time. .
Expand your mind and become a sensual being, not a purely sexual one.